Mind your language ;-)

Mind your language!

I am originally a Londoner born within the sound of ‘Bow Bells’, at the age of 5 we moved out to the ‘garden of England’ Kent with all the other London overspill in the 1970s and 1980s our neighbours were from Brixton and Hackney.

So let me be clear when I say mind your language I am not talking about dropping your ‘atches’ or swearing. I am referring to the way you talk to yourself, out loud or in your mind. I often hear my kids say “oh I am so bad at that” or my gorgeous clients referring to themselves “I have always been a big girl”

Other phrases like:

“I am big boned”

“I have always been a big girl”

“I can’t run, I am not made for running”

“I’ve never been able to stick at anything”

Well, hazard a guess what your subconscious is hearing?  When you use these phrases what are you telling your subconscious? What are you pre-paving your future to be?  Whether you want to or not you are affirming that you are:  big boned, useless at exercise, never complete things. Moving on and moving forward in your life will be difficult if not impossible if you and your subconscious don’t believe that you can and ever will.

I have discussed at length in other blogs why diets don’t work and why your inner teenager will rebel when you put her on a diet. I have chatted at length about restricting yourself and how that is very hurtful to your psyche, how it is emotionally draining, exhausting to keep to the same prescribed diet.

Berating yourself for not sticking to your strict regime or failing to finish something that you have started hurts you more than you know.   So mind your language, gorgeous girl. Speak kindly and positively to your wonderful subconscious mind, nurture your inner teenager and turn her into a goddess of power.

Your conscious stream of thoughts are exhausting you. I know because I have a constant stream.  It would be impossible to monitor everything that you think and say, that is not what is required. or what I expect you to do.  Simply begin to notice how you speak to yourself, keep it simple. That is the gorgeous way … small steps, tiny habits and pre-pave the way for BIG changes.

My stream of thoughts are generally surrounding my work ethic and perfectionism. My internal brain chatter goes something like this:

“Unless you are working 24/7 you are never going to be worth anything.”

Take a moment to consider how you speak to yourself.  What limiting statements do you make out loud?  How do you describe yourself to others? One of my clients confessed to me that she gets in with the jokes about herself before anyone else does.  So she can limit the damage and hurt that she will feel when others make a rude comment about her bum.  She gets in their first before they can with a rude joke.  But hold on a minute, what if they weren’t going to say anything rude.  What if your new friend or acquaintance didn’t notice your bum or tummy but instead noticed how quickly you smiled and your funny vivacious personality. What if you second guessed the conversation incorrectly based on your own opinions and in fact hurt yourself in the process?


Don’t miss: Not all fat is bad


Take a moment – what is your brain chatter?

Retrain your mind by recognising the words you use every day to yourself in your mind chatter and out loud to other people.  The words below give you an idea of the limiting belief you have about yourself. Consider the words that you use about yourself with others and to yourself.

The words below keep you in a guilty past and fearful. You are unsure of yourself when you use these words, and you are perpetuating a fearful future.  As a result, you are reinforcing the feeling of conflict in your conscious and subconscious thoughts. You may very well want to change but the use of these words informs your brain that actually you don’t.

Recognise your brain chatter

The more you recognise the use of these words below, know when you use them.  The more you will recognise that they interfere with your inner peace.  Simply by being aware of their use will make it easier for you to eliminate them from your speech, thoughts and daily expressions.

Simple Exercise:

Work on this simple exercise I picked up from a book recently:  think about holding a kitchen bin or a black bin liner. Imagine and visualise yourself putting these negative and disempowering words into that bin everytime you utter them.  Then you can go out into your garden  and bury your imaginary bin at the end of the day.  Your imagination will do wonders in creating a new you.

2017-03-13 09.17.56

Words that keep you in the past – BIN THEM 🙂

Personal transformation

Here are some of the words that hold you back and keep you in the past with your thinking:

  • impossible
  • can’t
  • try
  • limitation
  • if only
  • but
  • however
  • difficult
  • ought to
  • should
  • doubt

Consider any words that place you or anyone else in a category, for instance, I am a woman and therefore I should be making the dinner. Any words that tend to measure or evaluate you or other people for instance “I can never do that I don’t have the confidence”

Look out for words and phrased that tend to judge or condemn you or someone else like “she will never do that she is too fat”

Be gentle with yourself

It is important to be gentle with yourself. If you find that they are continually using negative words don’t be angry or frustrated merely notice it and think of their use as a mistake that you can easily correct and choose not to feel guilty about making a mistake.

Gossiping about others

We all love a natter, a good chin wag, keep your conversation light.  Keep your mood high, talk about silly stuff and be happy. When you gossip others you are actually hurting yourself.

I saw a poster once that said gossip was bullying behind somebody’s back.

Avoid it – please x


Don’t miss: Comparison is the thief of your happiness


Trust the gorgeous process.

Short term solutions to these emotional triggers work but they work better when you have your long term habits embedded.

If you like the idea of working with me

You can find out more without having to commit  by opting in to receive some more information about Get Gorgeous Fundamentals here:


The wonderful thing is that getting healthy is easy.  OH YES, IT IS –  when you apply small habitual steps and with encouragement from me and the other gorgeous girls in our community you stick to your gorgeous habits because they are habits and not a strict set of instructions, rules or something nutty you wouldn’t do naturally.

My mental health has always been focused on my exercise and what I eat so that I can exercise and feel good and have bags of energy to drive everyone else crazy 🙂

If you like the idea of working with me

You can find out more without having to commit  by opting in to receive some more information about Get Gorgeous Fundamentals here:



Speak soon much love

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